~Even though I was thrilled to be part of a church, with plenty of opportunities to love and serve others, a part of me held back from becoming completely involved. I felt I was re-learning everything~. As a couple, we slowly, carefully, read the Bible as if for the first time. Getting rid of religious legalism was a lengthy process. God was the only One who fully understood our journey. I longed to share with another person who would understand. Richard's family provided that outlet, and it was refreshing to share with one another, knowing we were equally understood.
I was soon baptized at church, ashamed it hadn't taken place earlier in life. Since I had been a legalistic Christian, baptism had been something I feared. I had wondered as a child (and young adult) if I was "good enough", always coming to the conclusion that I was lacking. What if I were baptized, then realized my heart hadn't been right with Him-- and I made Him angry?
What I had failed to understand, was that baptism is simply a testimony of your acceptance of Christ as Savior; symbolically dying and Resurrecting with Him; testifying that you'll live for Him the rest of your life through His strength. There was nothing to fear! :) [note: when I was 12, I backed out of being baptized with my sister and several friends. Everyone later forgot, and thought I had been baptized with the group of girls].
Remember our beloved home in Rogersville, Missouri? Caleb was 3, and Antonin was 14 months old when we decided to move closer to Richard's family- leaving our little Rogersville house behind. We made the move thinking we would live southwest of Springfield, Missouri, for a very long time. Perhaps until the kids were teenagers! We enjoyed being close to family, and Republic, Missouri was a nice little town to live. Richard continued his online school, along with working his evening/night post office position.
Caleb, Antonin & I looked forward to waking Richard mid-day. The waking event remained the highlight of the day. At my cue, the boys would run into the bedroom to jump on daddy. They would have many exciting boyish things to share, and Richard would patiently listen (wishing he hadn't been so rudely awakened). :)
Partly to help keep the boys quiet while Richard slept, I taught Caleb & Antonin school at home in the mornings. We had some awesome times together!! Seeing how the boys were only 4 1/2 & 2 1/2 at the time, I should have just played with them outside- all day!! LOL!! New home school moms live and learn. :)
When I discovered I was expecting a baby, I cried. I had been experiencing some new health issues (diagnosed with Hashimoto thyroiditis), and was concerned about the pregnancy-especially with problems immediately after discovering the pregnancy. My worries were relieved, however, after an ultrasound showed a healthy 6 week-gestation baby. God had blessed us with a new little life-- it was the cutest looking "peanut" I'd ever seen. :) : )
During my pregnancy, Richard began looking more closely at Accounting positions within the Postal Service to boost his resume (and not have to work nights!!). He would finish his Accounting degree in another 2-3 years. The nearest postal transfer would be the city of St. Louis. I knew chances were slim that Richard would be chosen if he applied, so I didn't think much about it. I quietly listened to him, hoping he wouldn't be too disappointed when he wasn't selected.
When I was six months pregnant, we left the boys with family and drove 4 hours to St Louis. Richard took a Postal Accounting exam to qualify for a job opening, while I savored a little peace and quiet at the hotel room. We enjoyed visiting St Louis, but I continued to doubt anything would come of the trip. :)
A single mom to three teens, my life is a whirlwind while seeking a Bachelor's degree in Education and working two part time jobs. I have found that season's change much too quickly, and I miss the slower paced SHM days. Through every life change, I have learned that I must take time to treasure each moment, taking nothing for granted.
I enjoy writing on this blog like I would a journal, learning from lessons within my "every-day". I anticipate reaching my future degree and diploma, and wonder what new adventure(s) God has waiting for me!