~The never-ending road (or so it seemed)~ :)

    Richard still had two years of school left after our move to Illinois.

    I was relieved Richard no longer worked nights; it felt wonderful having him home in the evenings and on weekends!!! When we lived in Missouri, he worked nights & most weekends. I often went to family or church functions with the kids, whether or not Richard was available. Sometimes, he would decide he needed to work on his school work instead of participating in various activities or outings. I was understanding, but not without an inward struggle.  I didn't always voice my disappointment though, since I knew this was simply a season in life!! 

   Five years had already passed since Richard first returned to college, and we were both growing weary in the journey. Richard  took one class at a time because of his working a full-time job (Postal worker) and caring for a family. He was also very careful with his money and avoided debt.  I could have found a job, but the cost of child care would have canceled out my income. I knew I needed to be content within the season of Richard's "never-ending" school and work.

  So... back to our new home in Illinois.... 
Richard began working on his school work while commuting to and from work every day on the Metro Link (train). We were pleased with how well this worked for him, and how it didn't take as much time away from our family moments (or at least didn't seem like it- ha).   :)  :) :)
   A little over two years later, Richard informed me that he had just a couple of months left of school. Woo-hoo!!! We were both so happy!!!   :)  :)   :)

  We celebrated Richard's Bachelor's degree (Accounting) with a graduation ceremony in our yard & garage. Well.... not just for Richard, but for our second son, Antonin, who was graduating from PreK in our home school.
   It had taken a lot of persuasion for Richard to have a celebration at all.  LOL!!
Richard doesn't ever seek after or "need" attention.... he finally gave in though, partly because we were also celebrating Antonin.  :)  Our family celebration was so much fun! All of Richard's immediate family came, along with my parents from Indiana, and a couple of good friends. Once the graduation was finished, everyone hung around awhile, spontaneously playing music and singing together... it really was a special day full of sweet memories.  :)

When Richard began his schooling journey, we had one 15 month old child, and lived in Rogersville, Missouri. A little over seven years later, we lived in a different state and had three children, ages 7, 5 & 2~ :) 

 
Everyone has different stories s/he could share about God provision and guidance.  :)  I think it's a wonderful idea sharing these stories with our children- not only to pass along the great things God has done, but to acknowledge that even when we can not hear Him, He is busy doing 2,000 things at once. Our Sovereign God has a plan... and has always had a plan~ Nothing ever surprises Him or causes Him to scramble for Plan B.   :)  ["Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails," Proverbs 19:21]

I hope you have enjoyed these blog stories from our lives~!

~Our journey of life continues.... and I'll update you soon!    :)

~strangers~

Once the house was in order and the moving boxes thrown out, I began venturing out with my three young children. Ahead of time, I'd ask Richard to make maps for me so I'd know how to get to the Walmart super center and Target.  I was eventually grateful when I began to recognize the main road to our house.  :)  Richard, always a natural explorer, was never intimidated by the unknown. He would think of getting lost as a fun challenge. I, on the other hand, disliked not knowing where I was and feeling like a stranger.  I was often stressed when "turned around"... my heart pounding in panic trying to find my way home.

Joining a MOPS group in the area helped me learn my way around better and to meet other young moms (we were still looking for a church...plus, it takes awhile to make friends). I enjoyed the MOPS group very much, and began realizing that I was not the only mom who had given birth weeks before a move out of state. 

We had moved into a military area (Scott Air Force Base), and I soon heard all the military wives stories, which were full of more hardships than I could imagine. I didn't have the chance to begin feeling sorry for my lonely, lost self in a "stranger" world. I was meeting other moms who lived half-way across the continent from their families, or whose husbands were deployed for a over a year (sometimes just after having had a baby). I couldn't believe how "family-unfriendly" the military was... yet how military families stuck together, always being there for one another. I was also amazed there were Christians in the military who thought of their job as a calling from God. I had grown up in a pacifist home and had a different idea about people in the military. Christians willingly serving in the military was a bit mind-boggling for me!   :)  lol!

I honestly don't know where to stop with our family stories!!  As you know, this all started with how Richard & I met and married.... and now I'm not sure where to end!!   :)

Hmmm, perhaps I could end this "blog series" with Richard finally finishing school?
When we moved to the St Louis area, Richard was employed by the Postal Service, with a few years of school still ahead of him. I admit that I was not always the most understanding wife at times.  :)  


I'll save the story for next time ....   :)

~Our new (cold) home~

   When we arrived at our new home in Illinois, the boys excitedly ran around the yard to explore, while I took Ashlyn inside the house. Richard and the boys unpacked the mini-van, and then we all waited for Richard's mom & dad to arrive with their van and our U-haul.
   Once they arrived, Richard, Paul (his dad), and Darren (his youngest brother) began unloading the U-haul truck, while Lynette (Richard's mom) helped unpack items in the house.  Being mid-January, it quickly grew dark before even half of the truck was unloaded, so plans were made to finish unloading the next morning.
   Richard had set up our bed and one of the boys' beds (?), but his parents and brother found a motel since our house was so chaotic and full of boxes (note the truck wasn't even completely unpacked. lol!).
  I noticed that I was not feeling the best, but kept pushing nagging symptoms out of my mind. Surely I was simply tired from our move and caring for a newborn. Perhaps I was imagining things. I went to bed early, hoping sleep would help me feel better. For awhile, I listened to the wind grow stronger outside, making the windows vibrate. Several times in the night I awoke, thinking, "where am I?"   :)
   Strong, cold winds blew all through the night and into the next day. Paul, Lynette, and Darren returned to our house to help unpack the U-haul, with snowflakes dancing on their heads :)  :) . There wasn't much snow accumulation, if I remember correctly. The hardest part was the cold, cold wind.
  The men worked diligently to unload the U-haul, and I took several breaks from unpacking boxes with Lynette.  I was continuing to not feel so good, and feared a breast infection.
 Richard soon came inside the house winded, and with a red bump on his forehead. He had slipped off the U-haul truck's ramp, hitting his head on the truck! We were all relieved when, after several moments of rest, he was able to get up and unload the truck again!
  I felt terrible leaving my mother-in-law with the unpacking of boxes, but finally told her I was not well and needed to stay in bed. She ended up unpacking my entire kitchen! What a blessing to a very discouraged young mom!~   :)
     By the time Paul, Lynette & Darren left for their home in Missouri, I was half-way back to normal after having visited a doctor. We couldn't have made the move to Illinois without Paul, Lynette & Darren's help, and were SO very grateful!

  We had been within a fast moving whirlwind during Ashlyn's birth, Richard's new job acceptance, and our move out-of-state.  Richard's family had now left, and we felt as if our whirlwind had come to a pit stop, spitting us onto an isolated, freezing tundra. 
   In the quiet of our home, Richard & I looked at each other and asked, "What Now?!"
   God was silent.... and all we heard was the howling wind outside~    :)  :)
Richard soon left for his daytime job (yay!), while I wondered how I would handle going anywhere with three children ages 5 and under, without help.... let alone knowing directions anywhere--?
  For the time being, I would stay inside and just "be".   :)

~Our Move~

Richard & I went house hunting in the St Louis area when Ashlyn was just 3 weeks old- yes, we took her with us. :)  I remember wondering how she'd do in a hotel room since she was colicky.
     We soon decided that one could get more house for money on the Illinois side of the St Louis Metro area, and spent three or four days searching for a house. While walking through houses or meeting with realtors and bankers, Ashlyn occasionally decided to be grumpy!   :)  Sometimes I'd take her out to the vehicle and wait for Richard to finish our business dealings.
Our last day of house hunting came, and we still were not totally satisfied with our choices. We were also growing weary of the house hunt, dragging an infant around in the cold and rain (it was January).
Our realtor informed us of a new listing on the market, and asked if we'd like to see it. Sure- why not?!
We walked through the house twice, coming back later to walk through it again. There were many things we liked about the house, one being there was a big yard for the children to play. Richard & I made our final decision over dinner at St Louis Bread Company, concluding that if the owners were willing to move out in two weeks (the official date of our move), it would be the confirmation we needed from God to even proceed with the move at all [remember my previous post in our desiring God to show us for SURE we were supposed to move].
   We nervously waited to hear back from the sellers, well aware we would be heading back to Springfield, Missouri in the morning. Our time of house searching was coming to an end.
  Imagine our relief when the realtor informed us that the sellers had already moved into a different house, and would  gladly move their belongings out before the two week deadline.
 All the minute details of both selling our home in Republic, Missouri and purchasing a home in Illinois fell perfectly into place. Richard & I sensed an unusual peace that our move was meant to be and that God had everything under control.   :)
  We were all very sad and sentimental about the upcoming move, since we'd be moving away from family. Even with God's confirmations to both me and Richard, I still wondered how on earth I was going to handle three young children (one with colick) without the support of family, and WHY God thought I could handle this move?! I wasn't nearly as strong as He thought I was!!!
  This move to SW Illinois would place us right in-between our families, with my family living in Northern Indiana, so some good was coming of the move. We would no longer have to drive 10 hours to see my side of the family. :)

 The photo above was taken at our farewell party at Matt & Stephanie's house [Richard's brother] the night before leaving as a family for Illinois. All our belongings had been packed into a large U-haul and mini-van(s). After the party, we would spend the night with Matt & Stephanie, and then leave first thing in the morning, January 21st.
Caleb was 5, Antonin was 3, and Ashlyn was 6 weeks old.  :)
  The morning came early. We said our last goodbye's to Matt & Stephanie's family, and headed over to our  Republic, Missouri home for the last time. Once there, we discovered that the U-haul truck would not start!  Our friendly, mechanical neighbor jump-started the truck, joking, "Everyone will kill me when I tell them I helped you leave the neighborhood!"  
  Richard's dad drove the U-haul, Richard & I rode together in our mini-van (piled high with stuff), and Richard's mom drove their mini-van- full of more stuff.  :)
 As Richard pulled out of  neighborhood, I wrestled with mixed emotions. It was a very cold morning, so the windows steamed up, making it more difficult taking in our "one last glimpse" of everything.
 What an odd feeling traveling to a place we were totally unfamiliar with, not knowing what life would be like in our new home in Illinois. We marveled again at how well everything had fallen into place, and how we anticipated the future (actually, Richard was encouraging me- lol!!).   :)  :)
  What would life be like... and did God really know what He was doing?

~Joy within the unknown~

    Approximately six weeks after our trip to St Louis, Richard received a call for an interview. The "slight chance" of being selected for an interview, meant we were another step closer to moving four hours away from where we had originally planned to settle. I didn't know what to think.  I wanted to be happy for Richard, since he had waited so long for a change in his career; a change in his night shift!
I also discovered that the start date (if Richard got the job) would be right around the time of our baby's birth. How was I to manage a newborn, three year old, and five year old without the support of nearby family?  I struggled with question after question. Since Richard's interview went well, I was just a teensy-bit uneasy.   :)  :)

     I finally came to the end of myself. I asked God if the St Louis postal job was His plan for Richard's life ... would He please show us beyond a doubt that His hand was in it?

We had special prayer together as a couple, asking God to show us both the answer~ in a clear, undeniable way.

   My pregnancy went well until the week before my due date. I began having issues with  blood pressure, and was kept over night in the hospital to be monitored. I was sent home on complete bed rest. Bed rest?! ha! I wasn't sure I could do such a thing.

    Both family, and friends from church helped out so much! The boys played with their cousins, and were well taken care of by family. When family or friends from church would bring dinner, sometimes they would linger to visit with me. 

     December 9th, I planned to voice to Richard that I wasn't feeling very well ... when the phone rang and he answered it, disappearing down the hallway for a few minutes. He stuck his head back into the living room to mouth, "I GOT THE JOB!!" ~  my blood pressure immediately climbed higher and I felt worse. 

I was very pregnant, swollen, and flushed. I could not move from my position in the recliner (need I say more?)... and my husband was joyfully celebrating a new job. A job that would require an out of state move in six weeks.  

     Richard understood my fears and frustrations and told me that he would take care of everything. lol! :)
Little did we know we'd have a baby the very next day.

     Bright and early December 10th, we took the boys to their grandparents house, anticipating a regular Dr check-up. My Doctor told me I was not going back home. My blood pressure was through the roof, and I had significant protein. While I was thrilled that my bed rest would be over and we'd finally meet our baby ... I also doubted we could move in 6 weeks after having a c-section!!!
     It was a girl!!!  What a special time it was, welcoming our new baby girl into the family!
What sweet memories! The boys loved their little sister, eagerly taking turns holding her.

Ashlyn Jeanae [named after both grandmothers] was not a pleasant-natured baby, however, and would scream at the top of her lungs until she was back in her mother's arms.   :)  :)  Ashlyn wouldn't allow anyone (but mom) to hold her without crying or screaming, and at first I thought it was kind of cute. :) After awhile, I began to fear that something was wrong with my newborn daughter. Her screaming changed from others holding her, to other unpredictable times.
At Ashlyn's 3 week check-up, the Doctor calmly stated, "No, I don't think anything's wrong with her; I think it's her disposition."
   Years later, I look back in time and laugh-out-loud!! At the time, however, I felt as if I had been given a prison term.  How were we to move out-of-state in only a few more weeks, plus deal with a colicky newborn?!  Since Richard still worked nights, I was the only one dealing with Ashlyn's night-time screaming. No fair!!  :)  haha!
     In the midst of our little family's adjustments, we put our Republic, Missouri house up for sale, and were surprised when it sold in ten days!!! My mom and dad from Indiana had come to help us pack and get the house ready to sell. I SO appreciated their help!!

     ~I was caught within a spinning, tossing whirlwind  .... yet enveloped within a peace that calmed all fears~

~Learning, Growing~

   ~Even though I was thrilled to be part of a church, with plenty of opportunities to love and serve others, a part of me held back from becoming completely involved. I felt I was re-learning everything~.  As a couple, we slowly, carefully, read the Bible as if for the first time. Getting rid of religious legalism was a lengthy process. God was the only One who fully understood our journey. I longed to share with another person who would understand. Richard's family provided that outlet, and it was refreshing to share with one another, knowing we were equally understood.
     I was soon baptized at church, ashamed it hadn't taken place earlier in life. Since I had been a legalistic Christian, baptism had been something I feared. I had wondered as a child (and young adult) if I was "good enough", always coming to the conclusion that I was lacking. What if I were baptized, then realized my heart hadn't been right with Him-- and I made Him angry?
What I had failed to understand, was that baptism is simply a testimony of your acceptance of Christ as Savior; symbolically dying and Resurrecting with Him; testifying that you'll live for Him the rest of your life through His strength. There was nothing to fear!  :)  [note: when I was 12, I backed out of being baptized with my sister and several friends. Everyone later forgot, and thought I had been baptized with the group of girls].

           Remember our beloved home in Rogersville, Missouri? Caleb was 3, and Antonin was 14 months old when we decided to move closer to Richard's family- leaving our little Rogersville house behind. We made the move thinking we would live southwest of Springfield, Missouri, for a very long time. Perhaps until the kids were teenagers! We enjoyed being close to family, and Republic, Missouri was a nice little town to live.
     Richard continued his online school, along with working his evening/night post office position.
  Caleb, Antonin & I looked forward to waking Richard mid-day. The waking event remained the highlight of the day. At my cue, the boys would run into the bedroom to jump on daddy. They would have many exciting boyish things to share, and Richard would patiently listen (wishing he hadn't been so rudely awakened).  :)
     Partly to help keep the boys quiet while Richard slept, I taught Caleb & Antonin school at home in the mornings. We had some awesome times together!!  Seeing how the boys were only 4 1/2 & 2 1/2 at the time, I should have just played with them outside- all day!!   LOL!!  New home school moms live and learn. :)

         When I discovered I was expecting a baby, I cried. I had been experiencing some new health issues (diagnosed with Hashimoto thyroiditis), and was concerned about the pregnancy-especially with problems immediately after discovering the pregnancy. My worries were relieved, however, after an ultrasound showed a healthy 6 week-gestation baby. God had blessed us with a new little life-- it was the cutest looking "peanut" I'd ever seen.   :)  : )
     During my pregnancy, Richard began looking more closely at Accounting positions within the Postal Service to boost his resume (and not have to work nights!!). He would  finish his Accounting degree in another 2-3 years. The nearest postal transfer would be the city of St. Louis. I knew chances were slim that Richard would be chosen if he applied, so I didn't think much about it. I quietly listened to him, hoping he wouldn't be too disappointed when he wasn't selected.
When I was six months pregnant, we left the boys with family and drove 4 hours to St Louis. Richard took a Postal Accounting exam to qualify for a job opening, while I savored a little peace and quiet at the hotel room. We enjoyed visiting St Louis, but I continued to doubt anything would come of the trip.  :)

[to be continued...]

~Wrestling, Waiting~

   ~Life continued on~
 Our " new normal" meant Richard attended a local college part-time during the day, and worked at the post office at night. I grew used to our schedule, and kept very busy at home with our sweet little boys!
We traded off babysitting with Richard's siblings once a month, and discovered that dates were wonderful!! Every married couple with children needs dates!!!!   :)
   ~After one year of college, Richard began CLEP-ing out of general college courses, then eventually heard about an online school (Excelsior college). Even with attending college the cyber non-traditional way, we could see that his schooling was going to be a very long road. Many times Richard grew discouraged that the light at the end of the tunnel was so far away, so far out of his reach.
 ~When Antonin was 4 months old, Richard & I left the church group he had grown up in. After visiting several churches in the area, we found that church hunting was not an easy task. Antonin was a clingy baby and would cry and scream every time I left him in the church's nurseries. I was constantly paged to the nursery, and grew tired of accompanying Richard -since I couldn't enjoy the services anyway! I often stayed at home with Antonin, while Richard & Caleb checked out churches. Once we settled on one place to attend, I joined in with Antonin, hoping he'd eventually grow used to being in the nursery.

Through our entire year of church searching, we discovered that not one church is perfect, and that one chooses the most Biblical place where their souls will be fed and ministered to. As a relational female, I didn't enjoy church hunting at all.. I'd try and get to know people, only for my husband to decide we were moving on ... and I didn't like that!  lol! I often thought to myself that searching for churches causes a person to long more for Heaven- the only perfect place!!  :)
~ During the time of church searching, I attended a MOPS group ("Moms of Preschoolers"). I was immensely blessed to be able to set aside church searches and spend time with other ladies. I could talk with them about my children's latest development or latest parenting issues, without church topics ever arising. I felt SO refreshed!!!    :)   :)  :)
~After attending an Evangelical Free church for awhile, Richard made the decision that our family would continue to attend regularly. With this decision came relief that I could begin volunteering my time or signing up for various events. Richard & I hosted a 6-8 week Bible study in our home, and volunteered to help on the nursery rotation. How wonderful to be needed again and serve others!!   :) I felt like a FREE bird!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!   :) : )  : )

~By the way, our family relationships remained intact; Richard's family eventually changed churches too.

~An uncomfortable stirring ~

     When Caleb was about 15 months old, Richard dropped some bomb shells on me!  Folks talk about men going through mid-life crisis' at age 40, but I think he's already gone through it (unless there are two per lifetime- heehee).   :)
     Richard voiced that he longed to attend college and pursue a degree in Accounting, realizing he should have done so many years before. I knew in my heart that even though this "mountain" appeared nearly impossible to climb, he needed to feel fulfilled in his career (aka school at that point). I felt almost numb when Richard informed me that it would likely take 6-8 years to reach his goal, with working full time. The picture perfect idea of my husband eventually becoming Postmaster at a small post office [his original "day job" plan] splintered before my eyes. I needed to re-program my mind and prepare myself for some major up-hill climbing.
    The thought entered my mind that since life was going to be tough for years upon years.... perhaps we shouldn't have anymore children.
    Not long after, I discovered we were going to have our second child in August- exactly two years after Caleb's birth. I had previously stated I would never again have a summer-time baby, so this taught me to not make "I'll never" statements. I also learned that God has a sense of humor!   :)

     Not only had Richard become dissatisfied with his job, he began questioning the teachings of his church group. He studied and researched several Scripture passages, asserting that we should be living more fully in Christ, not so concerned with unspoken or spoken man-made rules. From the book of Galatians in the Bible, he studied how we are God's children by God's grace & power alone, not by any human effort. Experiencing freedom in Christ meant to actively trust and rely on the Holy Spirit moment by moment. "Fulfilling the law" simply meant loving and serving others with Christ's love.
     Richard's heart desire was to find a church similar to the early church mentioned in the book of Acts, in which to raise our family! :)  I wondered if such a concept was too good to be true; I didn't know what to think. I recognized that Richard studied, researched & spoke truthfully, but I dragged my feet with the idea of changing churches. Richard's dad was pastor- I didn't want to rock the boat! :)  Plus, I was finally getting to know some of the people at church better, and couldn't stand the thought of starting all over with new friends-- again!!
     God was stirring both our hearts, and His truth was uncomfortable. 

   Our second son- Antonin Richard- came into the world 12:14 pm (just in time for lunch) on August 25th, 2001. What a sweet baby-- with dark hair and chestnut-brown eyes!!  :)

    We now had one blue eyed, and one brown eyed boy. My little boys were as opposite as they could be, but full of joy. They were my life, and kept me moving when I didn't feel like it. I felt as if I couldn't talk with anyone who would fully understand Richard's "life crisis", so I poured myself into our children and talked quite a bit to God ("What's happened to the man I married, God?!?!" LOL!!). :)   Antonin was such a happy-go-lucky, laughy baby, and Caleb loved to make him giggle. The most difficult days were brightened by laughter in our house.

       I was a very blessed woman- even during the "year of the bomb shells" [lol!!], and while I wondered what the future held, God had it all under control.   :)

~Home Sweet Home, Part 2~

     Life was sweet and good ... in our little home in Rogersville.   :)  :)  :)

    Once our house was arranged and cleaned to my satisfaction, I began to feel lonely.
What was I to do while Richard was sleeping or working? I was still getting to know people in Missouri and didn't want to visit my sisters in laws every day!  :)
As mentioned earlier, Richard worked evenings/nights at the Post Office, so I did not want a "typical" full-time day job. We wouldn't see each other often! I needed a part-time job that did not require me to work 5 weekdays.
     After some searching, I discovered a nanny/babysitting agency that was hiring babysitters.
 I babysat for various families when the need arose (mostly weekends). Now and then the director of the agency would call me in a panic!
One of those last minute desperate calls was for someone to watch six children. I was scared to death, but said yes.  It was the hardest babysitting job ever, because the (oldest) ten year old daughter had a "know-it-all" attitude and did not follow instructions well. I was more comfortable working with toddlers and preschool aged children!  When the parents returned home six or seven hours later, I was extremely exhausted!!!
    Eventually, two separate families asked me to be their "regular" sitter; one day per week for each family. I was able to turn down last-minute panicked agency phone calls, and stick with my pleasant routine caring for  toddler girls- two days a week!!!   :)  I loved my jobs!! Both families were like extended family.
   A year and a half later, one family re-located and no longer needed me. Around the same time, I found out  that I was expecting my first baby!  Around 5 or 6 months pregnant I stopped babysitting altogether; it was time for me to prepare and care for my own children!
    Quick funny story:  
Richard was off work and stirring homemade goodies for Christmas, thick in the process of making fudge- when I excitedly ran into the kitchen with the news that I was expecting. We were both happy and anticipated sharing the news with others, but since the fudge was a total flop, have joked that Richard was a nervous wreck.  haha~   :)

    Our first baby- Caleb- was born August 11th, 1999, and we were nicely surprised  to see that he was a blondie!! Since Richard & I both had dark hair, people would often take a second look and comment on our blond little boy.  We were thrilled to have a blondie, and my heart often melted when I looked into his clear blue eyes ....  :)
     Time spent with Caleb was precious, and with each passing day I learned more about Motherhood and balancing life with baby. No, I did not have everything figured out after having been an early childhood educator, a nanny, and babysitter ... :)
    Now, Caleb & I would tip-toe out of the bedroom(s) each morning, waking Richard from his slumber late morning or early afternoon. Waking daddy remained the highlight of the day as Caleb grew older ~

Life was sweet and good .... in our little home in Rogersville!!!    :)  :) 

~Home sweet Home~ Part 1 :)

     Entering real life ... Richard resumed his night/evening shift at the Post Office in Springfield, Missouri, while I cleaned and rearranged our little house in Rogersville. Neither one of us cared for his work schedule, but he sorted mail and that's how life was!   :) He'd come home in the wee morning hours; I would awaken, then tip-toe out the bedroom and go on with my day.  :)   [He would continue working the evening/night shift through our 7th year of marriage].

     I thought our little house was cute, and had fun making it a homey place. Our house was on one acre on a dead-end road, and though I loved the view- was not used to country living. I'll never forget the time a huge black snake slithered across the backyard, or when a snake was in the garage (I stayed in the house and waited for Richard to wake up).
     If snakes weren't bad enough, there were SPIDERS! HUGE, enormous spiders!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I'm a fairly composed individual unless there's a spider in the room that needs killed (with a carefully aimed pounce and victory scream).
     If a spider's on ME- forget it!!!!!
     One particular day- I believe it was a Saturday- I jumped into the car to go shopping, cheerfully waving goodbye to Richard working in the yard. I happened to look down to see that a large black spider was sitting on my lap!!!! I immediately began screaming, attempting to jump out of the car with my seat belt still on (I was trying not to touch the spider!).  I'm sure I was the funniest sight you've ever seen. Richard came running to me with a puzzled look on his face. I finally unbuckled my seat belt, and jumped out of the car. "There's a spider in the car--somewhere!!!  I'm not getting back in until it's dead!!!"
     After hunting in the car awhile, Richard sighed, "Sara, that spider crawled away and died. You gave the poor thing a heart attack!"    :)   :)
     I still wonder what the neighbors thought ....  :)   :)  : )

     I gradually grew used to crawly creatures in the country (or did I?), and our little house began to feel more like "home".    :)
     Richard's family was very hospitable and made me feel welcome in my new home state of Missouri. I recall many fun shopping trips with my new sisters and mother in law. [the rest of Richard's immediate family had moved to Springfield, Missouri, soon after we were married]
     I was content with my little life, though I was growing overwhelmed with meeting all the new people!! Everywhere I turned, I was meeting more of Richard's extended family members or friends of the family. I felt like a stranger in a new world, and soon all the names and faces blurred together in my mind ....
      One particular church work day, hours before a revival meeting, I was dusting and working along-side others I had just met a couple of months before. I was having a nice time talking with people .... and then for some reason, I melted.  Richard had not joined us at the church since he planned to sleep and then head straight to work that afternoon/evening, so perhaps I was simply missing his presence. Whatever the reason, I was near tears as I took a seat near the back of the church. I was introduced to more unfamiliar faces who had arrived from out of town- many of them extended family. As the service began, I tried not to let it bother me that I couldn't remember peoples' names and didn't know all the songs they were singing. I attempted to keep my emotions in check, but half-way through the service, decided to quietly leave. I wanted to run home and cry!! And I did!
     Later, my thoughtful mother in law called to ask if I was alright. I was grateful that she was understanding, especially since my father in law was pastor!   :)
     Richard eventually introduced me to more and more people, and I began to better connect names with faces- without melting. I gradually felt less like a total stranger, and more like a Missourian~

     Life continued on ... in our little house in Rogersville .....

Travel, travel, travel ....

     Picking up from where I left off a few posts ago ..... after Richard & I enjoyed our beautiful February wedding (45 degrees, no rain), we left for the wedding reception in Richard's green Saturn, stuffed full with my belongings!!  Remember- not only was I getting married, I was also moving my things to my new husband's house in Rogersville, Missouri!!  My blue Geo Prizm was also full to the brim with my stuff, and I wondered how the Prizm would make its way to Missouri .... seeing how we didn't want to travel separate!!!!  [Richard says he had it all under control, I just didn't know it ... :)]

     While at our reception, one of Richard's Uncle's from Kansas offered to drive our Prizm to Missouri for us. He and his wife had traveled by airplane to Indiana, but one of them had gotten very sick and preferred driving. Their plan was to drive the Prizm to Richard's house in Rogersville and then get a ride to the Springfield airport, where their car was parked. I was very grateful- though I felt sorry about their flight experience.   :(

     Talking with people at our reception, I must have subconsciously realized I wasn't going to see many of the people (including family) for quite awhile .... so  I lingered and lingered. lol! :)

     Richard & I finally made our get-away, but not before Richard's brother, Matt, decorated the Saturn.  We had obviously lingered a little TOO long, giving Matt & his helpers plenty of time to completely stuff the car full with balloons. It was so funny!!!  :)  :)  :)   [the photographer had to leave before Matt was finished with the car, and before Richard & I took off ]

      Saying our last goodbyes to friends and family, Richard and I sped away, honking and throwing lots of balloons out the windows. In case you're wondering about "Sarai" written on the car window...  Matt jokingly called us, "Sarai  & Abram".   :) 

     We were headed for Rogersville, Missouri in order to drop my stuff off ... before traveling to Tulsa for a long flight to Hawaii!!!  Yes, my head is spinning reading this. I can't believe how much we traveled those first two days as husband and wife!!!   :)

     About mid-day the next day (Sunday, Feb. 22nd), we arrived in Rogersville to drop my stuff off at the house. Richard's Uncle & Aunt arrived with my Geo Prizm not too long afterwards!  This was back in the time when we didn't have cell phones, so it's a wonder we both arrived in Rogersville within the same hour!

    We took Richard's Uncle & Aunt to the Springfield, Missouri airport, then headed toward Tulsa. [Richard got a good price for tickets flying out of Tulsa; he paid for the entire honeymoon, by the way].
       Hawaii was a gorgeous place, and we had a wonderful time exploring two islands: The Big Island, and Kuaui. We enjoyed kayaking and snorkeling, walking rain forests trails, and viewing magnificent water falls!! We also took a submarine ride in the ocean and explored a volcano that was slowly erupting into the ocean.
       One of the Bed & Breakfast's we stayed at served fresh fruit every morning .... the best I have ever eaten in my life!!!! I felt quite spoiled. I mentioned several times to Richard that I felt as if we were in the Garden of Eden ....   :)
    We hardly wanted to return home .... Richard would soon resume work at the Postal Service, while I would adjust to being a new bride in a new home, in a new state. We had spent a total of 10 glorious days in Hawaii, and now were headed into "real life".

[to be continued...]

~"Yes"~ :)

     I moved into an apartment in New Castle, Indiana, and my job hunt began.  I was eventually hired as the lead teacher for three and four year olds at a brand new Preschool/Daycare center, and loved my job very much! My time line in these blog posts is a bit off ... I believe I was a teacher for about two months before Richard proposed. It's hard remembering time lines from 14 years ago!  :)
   
     I was doing well on my own, the weather was changing crisp and cool, and I was still answering Richard's lists of questions.   :)
     Richard flew me down to Missouri one weekend in November, and I was "almost sure" he would propose to me during this trip because of the questions he had been asking. I had a nice visit with his family (his parents were visiting their children in Missouri at the time, too), and I remember it being a fun, full weekend.   :)  Sunday morning church service (and lunch) came and went, and I began to doubt myself. "Maybe Richard isn't going to propose this time," I thought. The timing had seemed perfect with his parents visiting Missouri too, but maybe Richard had something else in mind. I was to return home early the next morning, and thought to myself how he was running out of time.
     Later in the afternoon, Richard mentioned that he needed to stop by his house to drop something off. He had just purchased a little house in Rogersville, and the whole family (including me) had already taken a walk through it. I agreed to accompany him, thinking he was going to take me out to dinner afterwards.   :)
     At the house, Richard scrounged around in his trunk while I wandered around the garage a bit, finally growing impatient and walking inside the house. I was taking my time wandering around since Richard had seemed to misplace something (he told me later he didn't really have anything to drop off, so was trying to act like he was busy looking for something).

     I ended up in the kitchen, gazing at the old kitchen cabinets. Richard finally closed his car's trunk to walk into the kitchen and ask more questions. "Do you like the cabinets? We could always paint them."  I nodded and talked a little about how I had painted the cabinets in my apartment. We continued on and on about the cabinets in the kitchen. It wasn't until he asked, "Would you like to live here?", did I realize where he was headed.  I answered, "Sure- I think I'd like to live here someday..."
He then proceeded to ask if I'd marry him, and my answer was "yes".    :)   :)   :)
Afterwards, Richard took me to a jewelry store to pick out an engagement watch; the church we attended taught against jewelry, including wedding rings.

   We were both very excited over the upcoming wedding, settling on a wedding date 3 months away. I still can't believe the whirlwind it was!  After returning to Indiana, my days were filled with wedding plans, phone calls, and shopping (besides working as a teacher in the Day care, of course). Since Richard, my mom, and sister all lived far away from me, most of the planning was over the phone. My sister helped coordinate music, sending cassette tapes through the mail.   It would have been nice if we had the Internet back then!!  Richard & I decided we would memorize special, non-traditional vows, and sing a song to each other ("Cherish the Treasure"). Looking back, I think I would have been less stressed on my wedding day if I didn't sing or have vows to  memorize!  lol!!    :)
     Shopping for a wedding dress, I realized very quickly that I would not be able to afford a used dress (or at least one I liked). I was scraping bottom financially with paying for the wedding. My dad was not good in health and no longer worked a job. Mom was working, but it was simply a difficult time. I momentarily thought Richard & I could elope ... hee hee ... then decided against the idea.

      I took a chance, and asked Richard's mom if she would mind making my wedding dress. I knew she had sewn her daughter's wedding dress, and figured she would not be thrilled with the daunting task. She agreed to the project and I felt so relieved!  We went shopping together for the wedding dress material and other items; I also found material to make my own veil.   :)  My pastor's wife made all  the bouquets, flower girl basket & corsages. She also lent floral pieces she had used at her own wedding (oh- I think I borrowed her hoop/slip, too! ].
     Somehow, everything came together, and on February 21, 1998, Richard & I walked down the aisle of the church we had met. Yes, we successfully sang "Cherish the Treasure" to each other, and did not forget the words to our vows.   :)
 

 Remember a blog post ago when I talked about not putting God in boxes because He's too great and Sovereign? What's funny is that after we were married and living in Rogersville, Missouri .... we thought we'd live there for the rest of our lives. Isn't God amazing, and life such an adventure?!!   :)

~Changes~

     I discovered that Richard had called and asked the pastor for my address.  :)   Richard's family and the pastor's family were long time friends and knew each other pretty well, though did not attend the same church. I had met Richard's dad, mom, sister, and youngest brother during a church service in January --and had eaten dinner with them when most of the congregation went out to eat afterwards. At the restaurant, I talked with Christi (Richard's sister), about her upcoming wedding in March [yes, Richard is the oldest in his family and two of his siblings married before he did].
What's so funny & ironic, is that I recall Christi telling me about a single older brother in Missouri, laughing about how he didn't know what he wanted in life. I had thought to myself that I did NOT want a man like that. I guess I just needed to meet him.  :)
     Richard visited my church in April, after his mom and sister told him about me. So .... remember when he asked what my name was?  He already knew it!!!! Not only did he know my name, but he already knew quite a bit about me!!!!

     Though I was thrilled God had sent Richard into my life, I was a little confused. My original plan was to eventually move closer to the church I attended, marry, and live in the Central Indiana area the rest of my life. Richard lived in Missouri and showed no interest in moving back to Indiana; plus, he was involved in a different church group where his dad was a pastor!! This didn't quite line up with what I thought God would have for my life ....   :)    A friend in college once told me that one cannot put God in a box, because He works outside boxes all the time.  I proceeded to read various Psalm passages, realizing just how mighty and in-control God is, and how silly I was for attempting to contain His handy work. I also read Isaiah 55:8: "'My thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are my Ways your ways,' declares the Lord."
     The more I got to know Richard, I knew that he was "the one" for me ... and I resolved that no matter how difficult it might be making the church change and moving to another state, somehow it was part of God's plan. [our church groups were very similar in beliefs, but most people only married those within their own group. Closer to our wedding date, when others questioned my marrying Richard- I questioned myself again- returning to the same resolve. I knew in my heart this was a "God thing".]

     My employer was interested in my future dreams/desires and in Richard and my relationship, asking questions what I'd likely do in the future. I've always been a transparent individual, which is good in some ways, not so good in others (like ... in business). Not only did I proceed to share too much of my plans/dreams, I also talked about Jesus and discussed various topics with her. I couldn't help but wonder later if she had been offended.
     I was deeply disappointed and saddened when my employer told me she had found another nanny, and I was free to go. I was too immature and inexperienced to know how to deal with  or work out any misunderstanding, and didn't fight against her decision. My employer was doing what was right in the professional business world, protecting herself from possibly losing a nanny (she later told me that I was the best nanny she ever had).
     I chose to stay in the Central Indiana area since I didn't really want to leave the church I was attending (remember my dream/plan to move closer to church?). In the back of my mind, I was also thinking about Richard and how his parents lived in the area... I wouldn't want to move too far away ....  lol!!    :)
     We had only been dating for seven months, but Richard was asking all kinds of scenerio-type questions ... what would we teach our children (with coming from two different backgrounds) .... how would I handle a rebellious 16 year old ....could I see myself living in Missouri ...  ;)

     I knew a proposal was right around the corner....

No ordinary Sunday ... ;)

     Life was pretty good as a live-in nanny during the week, visiting relatives and church friends most weekends. The church I attended in Central Indiana was a sister church to the one my parents attended in Northern Indiana. Actually, when I moved to Indianapolis for the nanny job late summer, the church building was being remodeled- formerly was an old home. Until the building was ready for services, the pastor's family invited me several times to accompany them to a sister church in Ohio. I'd stay the night at their house Saturday evening, and we'd leave bright and early Sunday morning to arrive in time for the morning service! We would visit with the Ohio church people all day, returning to Indiana Sunday night. Seeing how I was the only youth in the church getting started, I looked forward to the Ohio trips.  lol!     :)   [yes, the sister church in Ohio was closer to us than the one my parents attended].
     Our last trip to and from Ohio (around October), the pastor asked me if I knew how to play the piano. Yes, I had taken lessons ... (but was not a good player). Since there was no one else in the new Indiana church who knew how to play the piano .... I ended up being the church's piano player. I was quite embarrassed and uneasy about this, and made sure I practiced, practiced, practiced on my keyboard at "home" (the nanny home) whenever I could~!
My mom was an organ player in her own church and gave me her extra Hymnal, which already had chords penciled in-- my lifesaver!!!  *Whew*!
It was customary for our church not to have music selections planned ahead of service, so being piano player was the scariest thing I've ever been in my life. Many Sundays (and Wednesdays evenings), a Hymn  would be suggested--- and I wouldn't know how to play it- I'd break out in a sweat!! I eventually learned how to "fake play". Songs I hadn't practiced or didn't know well, I'd just chord along in a different key (one I was familiar with), and people would think that I was playing the piano. They didn't seem to notice what key I was playing it in, either.   :)
     One Sunday evening in April, after having played a melody of Hymns before service started, I looked out into the audience from my little piano bench, and noticed a handsome, unfamiliar face sitting in a pew all by himself. I wondered who the young man was, and was SO grateful that I knew how to play the Hymns that were selected! I asked myself where I had seen the young man before, finally coming to the conclusion that he must be a relative of the family who had visited our church's revival services several weeks prior (I could see a family resemblance).
After service, I stood around chit-chatting with people as always ... when the unfamiliar young man walked up to me, and stuck out his hand for a handshake. "Hello, I'm Richard Sorrell- what's your name?"
We talked for a little while- about how Richard was from Missouri, visiting his family in Indiana, and how I was a nanny in Indianapolis, having recently returned from a trip to San Francisco, CA with my employer. We would have talked longer than 10-15 minutes, but since the congregation was small, I soon realized that everyone was staring at us (so it seemed, anyway).
After saying "goodbye",  and "it was nice meeting you", I made my exit.
While driving to my "nanny home", I moaned and groaned at myself. "I met the nicest guy tonight, and I'll never see him again since he's from Missouri. Why didn't I talk to him longer?"    :)   All the way home, I told God that Richard would be the type of guy I would  like to get to know if He could please send someone like him into my life .... I liked Richard's confidence and the way he could carry on a conversation (I was tired of guys who couldn't talk more than chit-chat, and he appeared my talking type... and yes, he was also cute). I naturally tend to err on the side of caution and a bit of negativity, so I proceeded to tell myself there was no possible way I'd ever see Richard again and that I might as well not give him another thought.
     A little over a week later, I returned home from my church weekend, to find that my employer had placed a yellow envelope- addressed to me- in plain sight where I'd see it (she wasn't home at the time). Taking a quick look at the return address and seeing Richard's name, my jaw dropped. "How on earth did he get my address?" I shrieked, ran through the house jumping up and down before even opening the envelope to read the card.  :)
In the card, Richard stated that it had been nice to meet me ... and after a bit of chit-chat, said to feel free to write back.  Of course I wrote back! I made myself wait a week and a half before mailing the letter though.  :)   haha ....
     Correspondence soon turned into phone calls, which eventually turned into his visiting Indiana again. He visited Indiana two or three times while we were dating, and flew me down to Missouri twice to visit him and his brother's family. I enjoyed staying at my future brother-in-law's house, getting to know my future sister-in-law and toddler niece!   :)  At this time, Richard's parents still lived in Indiana, so I saw them a lot when Richard visited Indiana, too ... I admired how much fun they had when they were together, and could see myself marrying into the family.

[to be continued ....yes, I'll share how Richard got my address, too ...]

~Daughter of a librarian~

How interesting, that I would have a meat cutter dad, and a librarian mother.   :)

How could two individuals from total opposite ends of the spectrum get together?!

Dad met mom's Uncle Ralph, a pastor in the Central Indiana area at the time, then was introduced to my mom at church. The joke is that dad liked Uncle Ralph's preaching so much, that he decided to marry his niece.  :)  

Dad had been married once before, so after becoming engaged, mom and dad discovered they could not get married in Indiana because of some legal issues. They had already dated awhile and didn't want to wait two more years to be legal! Mom received a teaching/librarian job offer in California (over the phone), accepted the offer, then made plans to marry her fiance' on the way to California- a little chapel in Las Vegas!!! Wow-my parents were pretty young and adventurous!!   :)  After about two years, they moved back to Central Indiana, where mom finished her Master's degree in Library Science and where their first child was born.

By the time their baby of the family was born (me), they lived in Plymouth, Indiana, then eventually moved to South Bend to live next door to my maternal grandparents
.
What exactly did I learn from my librarian mother? English rules, spelling, and a great appreciation for books at the library.   No, that's not to say that I was a natural speller. I was a notoriously terrible speller!!  My childhood arch enemy was Mathematics, and I cringe to think about my journey through it. Mom worked very hard  with me on math and spelling skills. I'd struggle for awhile- and once it was through my head, "had it" for life. Well, the spelling skills anyway.  :)   [Once mom was through with home schooling, she returned to the work force- loves her job as a school librarian.  :)  ].

I always admired how smart my mom was! Not only was she expert in literature, grammar, writing and spelling ... she comprehended math, history and science!! Well ... maybe not all areas of science, but if she didn't know something, she'd research and educate herself (the librarian in her).    :)
When the time came for my high school graduation from home school, she planned a nice graduation ceremony at church, just for me! Cap, gown, diploma, speeches- everything.  :)   I'll never have any high school reunions since I was the only graduate (no home school group), so it's nice having those graduation day memories.
When deciding what college to attend, it was my mom who visited campuses with me and helped through the paper work, financial aid, and scholarships. I was very excited to be accepted into Taylor University!!!  I knew mom was especially happy, seeing how she had attended Ball State University- in the same neck of the woods as Taylor.

After receiving my AA degree in Early Childhood Education, I earnestly asked God what I should do next with my life. Tuition was too expensive to continue schooling at Taylor without a solid goal, and I honestly had no idea what I wanted to do. Looking back, I was on the right track-why did I doubt?   I should have transferred to Ball State University and finished my major in Education with English emphasis. ha!  :)   :)  I laugh because I was like my mom and didn't know it (or hadn't wanted to accept it at the time~ silly me)!!!   [her major was English, later pursued Library Science]    :)

I made the decision to get a job instead of return to college. If my mom was disappointed, she never let on. She simply encouraged me to do what I felt was the best ...    :)
I was hired as a nanny by a lawyer in Indianapolis, but first I cleaned and organized her house and worked odd jobs in her Law firm, waiting for her first baby to arrive (I needed a job, she wanted me as her nanny). I  enjoyed many awesome  (first) experiences traveling with my employer, and taking care of her little boy.  :)  While rocking the little boy in my arms, I'd often look forward to the day I'd have my own little family, wondering what the future held. Living and learning in the real world challenged this sheltered Midwest little girl. I was forced to dig in deep to figure out what I firmly believed. God knew just what he was doing, both in challenging and blessing me.
As an added bonus, while a nanny ....  I met my future husband!!!!!!!

[to be continued....]

~Daughter of a meat cutter ~

Funny how certain memories come rushing back to you at the most unusual times.   :)
Last week while we were still visiting Richard's family in Missouri, his parents gave us some fresh meat all wrapped in thick white paper (not sure where they got it, but it wasn't from a store).
As soon as I saw the tightly wrapped white packages.... I suddenly transformed into a little girl wandering around a small grocery store in Northern Indiana where my dad worked- behind the meat counter.
My dad was more than a meat cutter-- old timers would have called him a "butcher" [I really sound old now- lol~]. I remember his showing me large chunks of meat hanging from hooks in the walk-in coolers/freezers (gross) ... and recall his story or two about how he cut up deer meat for some customers who came to the back of the store, requesting the service (he and his boss did this occasionally for people-- I'm thinking only for a select few).

[My mom & dad ]

Memories of dad at work involved a bloody white apron (eww), enormous blades guided by dad, cutting meat after meat after meat ....   :) .  Then, he'd pack the smaller pieces into those little white papers and hand them to the customers. I never figured out how he folded and tucked those papers so tightly- how do they do that?!  Oh yes, he also sliced lunch meat too, of course.   :)  I've always liked watching those slicing machines.
 Dad was a great people-person who made customers feel special with his chit-chat (never knew a stranger), going to great lengths  to please picky customers.   :)
He'd sometimes come home from work complaining how certain people were difficult to please and how one can't make everyone happy.    :)  Seems like he cut, wrapped, then re-wrapped  three different cuts of the same type of meat for an extra picky customer, only to have the customer turn up their nose and claim they didn't want any of it. In my girl heart, I held a grudge against that customer.  Haha!  :)   :) Most of the time, customers were reasonable and dad loved talking with them while serving their meat orders.   :)  His stories from work often included  new co-workers ('twas a very small country store, so co-workers included cashiers) and whether or not they were good workers. Poor workers irritated him, and workers who couldn't talk while working, amused him.
He ALWAYS came home smelling of raw meat, and I often noticed how his hands were slightly swollen and red. He'd tell me it was from working with cold meat all day long. Now I wonder why he didn't wear gloves?!?!  ;)  He enjoyed working with people, but didn't necessarily like his job.
Oh yes-- how can I forget dad's words: "If you could see what I see every day .... you wouldn't be eating the stuff...", which explains why dad cared little for meat (especially disliked chicken), and one reason why mom cooked many casseroles.  lol!    :)

Returning to present day 2012 .... little white packages lie waiting in our freezer ... reminding me of dad  (will I, or won't I cook them?).   :)  Haha~   :)

Me ... the daughter of a meat cutter in Northern Indiana .... marrying the son of a minister in SW Missouri. Not even my little girl mind dreamed up such a thing. Funny how life goes ... and I feel quite blessed.   :)   :)
I'll have to tell that story another time~!   :)

Yay, for cub scouts' Pinewood derby! :) :) :) Saturday evening, Caleb [WEBELOS I] and Antonin [Wolf] raced their cars @ their pack's Pinewood derby. During one round, they actually raced against each other. The far left car in photo is Caleb's. Antonin's is the yellow one right next to it. :) :) Neither one placed in the top 5, but we are very proud of their good sportsmanship!
Both boys know we won't be involved in scouts next year, for various reasons. I have felt badly for Antonin this year because his den never had any meetings. I was happy that Caleb's den got together, yet sad and worried that Antonin was going to think that we did everything for his older brother. I'm quite amazed with how understanding Antonin has been. He is such a fun-loving little guy who thinks the best of others at all times and thinks every thing's simply wonderful. lol! :) :) In place of scouts, we started Antonin with Tae Kwan Doe (spelling?). He seems to enjoy it, and tomorrow evening I will finally watch what he does! You see, Richard is traveling this week, and he's the one who usually takes Antonin [his travel is beginning to increase after a 10 month lull]. I have nearly forgotten what it's like to have my husband gone, and am hopeful my past experiences will kick in. :) :) No pun intended. lol! [get it? Tae Kwan Doe?] :) :) :) Goodnight! I need my sleep for this week!

:) :) I can't think of a title---

Well...I finished my first assignment today(one of thirteen). I will get a lot of practice with brain storming and writing articles...this first assignment was basically full of brain storming. I'm going to like this class even more than the first one I took. There's no research paper!! :) The class' projects include some extra reading and submission/resubmission(s) of a couple drafts to the instructor, with the intention of submitting to an editor.
We all have our difficult days or weeks. I had mine this past Thursday and then realized later on that I had experienced a "new kind" (to me) spiritual battle. I'm thankful that it's over... and have taken note what I should do next time [pray, recognizing what's going on]. I had had the most vivid, horrible nightmare Wed. night that seemed to last for a very long time [have you ever wanted so badly to wake up, but couldn't?]. The following day (Thursday), one bad thing after another happened, and I slowly turned into an exasperated mother! I'm thankful for God's goodness and faithfulness to us, even when we don't immediately turn to Him like we should. I have learned my lesson well.
Today is Richard & my 12th wedding anniversary!!! I am very grateful for a good husband and am looking forward to many more years together. He took me out to eat the other evening, and we had a wonderful time ALONE (I like my kids...it's just nice to enjoy some alone time now and then; their babysitter is wonderful, by the way!! She will be the most excellent teacher when she graduates from college!). :)
Last night I ground more wheat and baked more bread, and this time the bread turned out extremely scrumptious!!! Just in time for our anniversary! lol! :)
I honestly lost my train of thought while writing this, as I'm a nervous person....where oh where is my outline??? I had a major case of ADD at church today. Richard is all about efficiency and had encouraged me to do my "nursery co-coordinator" projects and duties while at church. I had told him I can think more clearly if I'm there by myself working on the extra projects (some other day of the week). Sure enough--I could not concentrate today on what I was supposed to be doing, and was probably the most rude and distracted lady you've ever seen. :) :) When I'm in the nursery any Sunday, I want to be with the people, play with the kids, etc. What excruciating torture having to focus on a project among other people. Anyhow, next time I'm going during the week, like I usually do. :) :)

More February thoughts

Great news on my brother! The hole in his lung is beginning to close, so possibly one more day until his chest tube gets removed (while talk of surgery fades away)! I'm sure that his family are good and ready for him to return home...I'm not sure how long the hospital will keep him after removing his chest tube, but he's been hospitalized since Sunday evening. If I know my brother well enough, I know that he is getting antsy. I wish I could help them out in some way.... I know that ultimately prayer is the best thing I can do...but still... [we live a full state away]

Living a double life is hard work! Private schooling and home schooling are two different worlds, and this school year has been interesting so far. I signed up for the "Mother's club" at my son's private school, thinking I would like to be involved in my child's school. Well, one can be involved in their child's school while also home schooling, but it is a lot of hard work. On the mornings the parents get together for their meeting, I bring my younger, home schooled kids in with me (they don't mind), but Antonin can't ever concentrate on the school work he brings with him because of all the commotion caused by parents and younger siblings. I also volunteered to help switch out the art work every other Tuesday. I really enjoy helping in this capacity, but feel guilty leaving Antonin & Ashlyn at a spare desk to color and do school work...only for other school kids (various age groups) to enter the room for their projects, thus breaking my kids' concentration. Get the picture: Me walking in and out of the room pulling old art work down and putting new art up in school hallways... then in the corner of the art room of which I'm walking in and out of... my two little children sit and stare with mouths gaped open (drooling?) while small groups of school children enter the room to create 3-D art projects. My kids continue their gaping stare, never uttering a peep. Talk about guilty mom feelings!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The art instructor had extra material recently and let my kids share a project of their own ... but I'm wondering if I should continue this all year. Besides the guilt, it does take a little away from our home school. I help with collecting/pulling down/ hanging art for about an hour (slightly more, perhaps), and we're usually able to finish our home school once we've returned home. Yet, I've noticed that motivation tends to be much weaker when we've spent even an hour of our morning somewhere else!
I have been seriously considering a different home school curriculum (for the younger two kids), and this particular curriculum has a co-op. I don't think I'll be able to swing helping at a private school and participating in a co-op. Something will have to give...even though I would like to be involved in my child's school. I'm praying that God will guide and help me with this double life!!! LOL!! [there are other curricular/ extra-curricular activities I have not mentioned. I don't want to bore you! ]

Well, I need to fix dinner. Antonin goes to Tae Kwan doe tonight...ack! I haven't even hemmed his outfit yet. :) Can do....can do.... can do....will do.... will do.... will do...

February news

My brother, Joe, lives with his wife, Sarah, and three kiddos in Northern Indiana. Today, I received a phone call from my mother who informed me that Joe's right lung had completely collapsed last night and that he was in the hospital. What?? My big brother in the hospital?? He's never sick!!! He doesn't smoke, hasn't suffered any injuries or illness...this lung collapse was totally "out of the blue"-- unexplainable [doctors are saying that people can get blisters on their lungs that burst, causing a lung to collapse; they think this is what happened to Joe]. In the latest update, it sounded like Joe was responding well to treatment, but still miserable...it will take a few days for the lung to heal. He could use some prayers....along with prayers for Sarah and their three kiddos as they balance daily life and this scary experience. Times like these I wish that I lived close enough to help my family. My parents are actually on vacation in Florida, so Sarah's family is helping with child care this week [I suppose I should explain that my brother is a stay at home dad, and that Sarah is a nurse].

Drastic change of subject... I registered last night for the next writing class through Taylor U. online. I'm looking forward to working through "Articles II". Time management will be the key to balancing motherhood, the house, meals..... and everything else. :) I need to get the kids into bed because I can't concentrate! They have been little monkeys all evening. Goodnight, and please say a prayer for my brother and his family. Thanks!