Our daughter Ashlyn Jeanae

Ashlyn= "dream; Ash tree lake" [interpretation: peaceful, reflective]

Jeanae (taken from Jean)= "God is Gracious"

Ashlyn was named after her Grandmothers; Lynette and Phyllis Jean

When I found out I was going to have a third child, I cried. I had just been diagnosed a month before, with "Hashimoto thyroid disease (an autoimmune disorder I'll have all my life)", and I was uncertain if the child would be healthy, or if I could successfully carry the baby [I had a few problems at 5 wks, then things improved]. Because of my boys having had their umbilical cords tied around themselves at birth, and because of my thyroid issues, we decided to have our baby with a female doctor, instead of using a midwife (the only midwife in the area at that time did home births and I wasn't fully comfortable with trying that). My Doctor was a fairly new Dr., but was a good communicator and researcher. :)

The pregnancy went well after month 4 ( I had felt sick all day long), and I tried to remember all the midwifery things I had done during Antonin's pregnancy so I could avoid the blood pressure problems. I did well until a couple of weeks before Ashlyn's due date, and wished I could have had a midwife's advice! ;) I began to experience very high blood pressure, and even had to spend 24 hrs in the hospital so the doctor could "monitor" me. While I was being monitored,Richard went back home with the boys (I thought I'd be fine by myself), and I recall sitting there in the hospital bed with my dinner tray in front of me-- feeling so alone. I bowed my head to pray over my food, but all I could hear was the deafening silence in the room. As I prayed, a peaceful feeling came over me, and a phrase popped into my head(not of my own), "I know what it's like to be alone... I know what it's like to be in pain.".....which was not only a comfort to me then, but a week later as well (you'll see why a little later in this story). The next morning, the doctor decided I was well enough to go back home, but that I needed to be on complete bed rest. How is one supposed to be on bed rest with two little boys at home?? Richard's family helped out a lot with the boys...taking them places or keeping them for a day, bringing magazines over for me to read, meals, etc. : ) : ) : ) I appreciated their help so much, and for the help of our small group from church who brought meals over, too. I did break the dr.'s rules at times....once people would bring the food to our house, I'd wait until they left the house...then would get up to "prepare" the rest of the meal before Richard would come home. No one knew... :) . I was so tired of sitting!!!! ;) It was awful not being able to do anything!!! I continued on bed rest for one week...and then the day before my routine Dr. appointment, Richard received a phone call from an employer in St. Louis (we lived in SW MO at that time). I'll never forget sitting in our recliner, all swollen and flushed from high blood pressure/pregnancy...and hearing Richard excitedly whoop, "I got the job!!" I was like, "But how are we going to move in 6 wks?!?! We haven't even had this baby yet!!!" Richard is an optimist, so he assured me that everything was going to work out alright and he'd take care of everything. I was unsure about it all...and it was making my blood pressure rise!!!! ;) The next morning, December 10th (a Friday), we left for my routine Dr. visit. We took the boys over to their Grandparent's house and continued on our way. At my 10:30 AM appointment, the Dr. checked my blood pressure once, twice, and then gave up. She told me to lie there on the examining table for awhile and that she'd try getting a better reading in a few minutes. I wondered to myself what was happening....knowing that I did appear very flushed and swollen, and had a headache. When she returned, she took my blood pressure again, and then settled in for a serious talk. "You have protein now, Sara, and the readings are dangerously high. You are in the first stages of eclampsia--known as preeclampsia. I would like for you to have this baby today." Richard and I asked a few questions about preeclampsia....like , how long could we wait around for the baby to come on its own....and the Dr. informed us that preeclampsia can sky rocket without any warning, causing there to be problems (or death) for mother and/or baby. We weren't sure about my being induced with having had a c-section with Caleb (first child), since there is a greater risk of uterine rupture with inductions than with going into labor on one's own. Plus, I was only dilated to barely 1 cm-- 0% effaced--and was not ready or "ripe" to be induced. She told us that I could continue to stay at the hospital waiting to go into labor on my own, or have the baby that day (c-section). The Doctor left the room so I could talk everything over with Richard. He asked me, "Are you sure you don't mind having another c-section?" I reminded him about the phrase that had come to my mind a week before in the hospital room...and how I felt that God had given me peace..had taken away my fear. I also didn't want to be waiting around in a hospital room for who knows how long, with things possibly getting worse- requiring an emergency birth. When the Doctor returned to talk with us, we told her our decision. A good doctor is also a good Psychologist ;) I'll never forget how she looked at me and said, "You are making the best decision for yourself and your baby...and I want you to know that this c-section is not a cop-out." She immediately had to hand over the kleenex box to me. :) We set the time for the c-section to be at 4:15 PM....then checked into the hospital. We had gone to the appointment without all of our overnight items, because we hadn't known we were not going back home...so while the nurses helped me settle into my room, Richard ran to Dollar General for tooth brushes! :) We had several hours to wait for the c-section...I, of course, had to lie in bed the whole time. I guess my condition was more serious than I realized even then, because they were taping towels to the sides of the bed (for padding) in case I'd have any seizures! I felt fine, to tell you the truth. Finally, it was 4:15 PM, and time to go have our new baby! I was wheeled into the surgery room, fully expecting to give birth to a baby boy. I was so excited and surprised when the doctor delivered the baby and asked Richard, "What is it, Daddy?" Richard's voice hesitantly said, "Is it a g-g-girl??" I couldn't stop laughing and smiling, and couldn't wait to see our little girl. Richard also cut Ashlyn's umbilical cord. One thing I'll never know (because I was so excited we had had a girl and didn't think to ask), is whether Ashlyn's cord had been wrapped around any part of her body like the boys' cords had been. :) Ashlyn Jeanae was born December 10th, 2004 at 4:27 PM, and weighed 6 lbs., 14 oz., and was 20 1/2 inches long. I couldn't believe how much black hair she had!!! :) A few hours after the c-section, I did have some afterbirth issues reminiscent of Antonin's birth, and was glad I was in a hospital {I simply cannot have children without having problems}.

Though we had given Ashlyn a "calm" name, she was anything but calm. :) : ) : ) She would cry and cry...and was colicky. I was so glad we had the help of my parents [& Richard's family] to pack for our move and get our house on the market, etc.....we did move 6wks after Ashlyn's birth. I really don't know how we did it, looking back. God had to have been the One working everything out for us. He has certainly been so gracious to us--as He is to all of us--day after day. :) : ) : ) It was quite an adjustment at first being away from any family--though we are now closer to my side of the family. We know without a doubt this is where we are meant to be in this season of our lives. Who knows what will happen next in this journey of life!! :) No, I'm not leading up to anything---we are done having children (I knew you'd ask). :) My heart is open to adopt, but for now I don't see that happening. :)

Our son Antonin Richard

Antonin= "invaluable; worthy of praise"
Richard= "powerful leader; brave ruler"
My second pregnancy was very different than the first one. I was VERY sick. I had a two year old (Caleb) to take care of mid bouts of horrible morning sickness. I learned to not eat much breakfast…and to eat later in the day. :) I was hopeful to have my baby naturally [VBAC] . I wanted to do everything I had longed to do with my first pregnancy/birth. I desired to go to a midwife for prenatal care, and to succeed with a calm, natural birth in the midwife’s birthing center. The midwife’s expertise of using preventive natural remedies and a healthy diet was attractive to me, and proved to be extremely helpful. I began having some signs of high blood pressure mid-pregnancy. The midwife changed my diet, gave me some natural "medicine", and the problem disappeared. I enjoyed a very good pregnancy (after the morning sickness was over) and did not swell as badly --though there still was some swelling simply because it was another summer pregnancy/birth! Soon after Caleb's birth, I had stated, "I'm never having another baby in August!!" Well....guess what? Antonin came along 2 yrs. and 2 weeks later--in August. I learned that God has a sense of humor...and that I should not make such statements. :) :) : )
The birthing center was in the middle of nowhere—in the Ozark mountains of SW Missouri, and it didn’t concern us that the nearest hospital was a good 30 minutes away from the birthing clinic—we figured it was close enough should we need it. Looking back, God had us all in His hands…in spite of ourselves!!!
I went one week passed my due date ….and wondered when I'd have the baby. I remember sitting on the front porch,not able to play with 2 yr old Caleb, because I was too big and weary! I was ready for the baby to come! Richard worked an evening shift during this time ( came home from work at 1AM), so I was concerned about going into labor without him home. One evening in particular, after putting Caleb to bed, I could not sleep. I was sitting on the couch reading, waiting to get sleepy….then … my labor began!! It was 1 AM on August 25th. I got up from the couch to walk around the house. I had had a lot of false labor pains ... but this time the pains never stopped! They kept coming, and I continued to breathe through them, hoping that Richard would hurry up and get home (we did not have any cell phones). I met Richard at the front door around 2:30 AM…he had stopped at the grocery store before coming home. Before he could say anything, I demanded, “Where have you been?! I think I’m in labor!” [instead of thanking him for bringing groceries home ] As always, he was very calm. He quickly put the groceries away and then began helping me through the labor pains. We informed the midwife, labored at home for about another hour until the pains came harder/longer, and then packed my things (and Caleb) into the car. Richard’s parents were going to meet us at the birthing clinic so they could take care of Caleb. It was a 45 minute drive..and once there, I began doubting that I was actually in labor. The midwife eased my doubts by confirming that I was indeed in real labor, and I got settled in my birthing room. I think Caleb was watching a video in the waiting room until Richard’s parents arrived…I don’t really remember that part. The labor was pretty calm ....we listened to soft music and Richard was so faithful & sweet to breathe along with me, as I worked through one pain at a time (I would start to panic if I breathed alone; I guess you'd say that Richard's breathing/calmness was my "focal point/concentration"). There was a Jacuzzi tub in the birthing room, and I loved it!! The water was very calming, and a great relief to my back labor. I went the entire labor and birth without any medication. Around 10:30-ish AM, I had stalled at 9 cm (bringing back memories of Caleb’s birth). The midwife broke my water…and I was soon at 10 cm and ready to push. By this time, I had gotten out of the Jacuzzi tub--wishing I could get back in it (they let you labor until 7 or 8 cm and then make you get out), and I was literally leaning on Richard for support. The pushing began at 11 AM. Most women naturally feel the urge to push, but I did not. All I felt was excruciating pain. Richard felt like crying. He asked, "What can I do to help?" I responded rather quickly, "Nothing! There's nothing you can do! Just be quiet and help me breathe!" The midwife normally allowed women to take their time during this last stage of birth, but she was concerned about our baby’s heart rate. She was calm, but I could sense the urgency in her voice as she coached me to “push harder than you think you can…”, and I eventually got mad at her because I couldn’t possibly work any harder!!!! That’s when she mentioned the baby’s heart rate. “We have got to get this baby out!” (it was spoken calmly, but with urgency). Memories of Caleb’s birth came to mind, so I tried to set to work even harder, ignoring my pain. Finally, after an hour of pushing, Antonin Richard was born into the world August 25th, 2001, at 12:14 PM, with his umbilical cord wrapped twice around his neck! Antonin was given oxygen, and more oxygen (he was crying and had a tinge of blue to his skin/lips) and then I held our new son. We were so happy to see him! : ) : ) The midwife soon made me hand him to Richard. Without going into detail, there were afterbirth problems, and she almost sent me to the hospital. She was eventually able to get everything under control. I happily took Antonin back into my arms, anxious to get to know him more. He hadn’t been weighed during this time….and all of a sudden he had a huge bowel movement [I was glad he had been swaddled in a towel by that time]. The nurses and midwife helped clean him up, and said that such a thing was not normal for a newborn (to that degree). Antonin had been in distress during his birth!!! We will never know how much he weighed at birth…he weighed 7 lbs., 13 oz., and was 20 ½ inches long-- after his bowel movement-- the midwife thought for sure he had been an 8 pound baby at birth. ;) Birthing clinics typically send mothers and babies (& fathers too :) ) home several hours after birth. I should have gone to the hospital instead of going home. We misunderstood the instructions with some natural medication, and I ended up having problems at home that night. Everything ended up okay, but I was very anemic afterwards. God is certainly worthy of all praise; we realized God’s goodness to us, and were so thankful for His protection and the safe birth of our little Antonin. I am hoping that he will live up to his name and always bring God glory and praise.
This experience caused me to become more passionate about Doctors and midwives working together in a hospital or birthing center setting (besides home birth). There’s so much a midwife has to offer in preventative prenatal care, and techniques in keeping the mother more calm and comfortable during labor (unmedicated!). However, when there are high risks/problems involved, Doctors and medicine are desperately needed. I’m happy to see the increase of doctors working with midwives in the Midwest, and hope that it continues. It’s nice knowing that maybe my daughter will have some pretty good options when she has children of her own some day. I’ll share the birth of my daughter soon. Even though her birthday isn't until December, I might as well share her story too! : ) :)

Our son Caleb Andre'

Caleb= "Faithful, Bold" ; Andre'= "Manly, Courageous"
Seeing how Caleb's 9th birthday is just around the corner....I've been thinking about his birth story. I actually think about it every year, and he seems to enjoy hearing it. : ) : )
I was a happy new mom-to-be in SW Missouri. The pregnancy was very good with hardly any morning sickness, and everything was absolutely perfect...until the last month. I began having high blood pressure problems,and was very swollen! The week before my due date,my doctor squarely looked at me and asked, "What have you been doing?! You need to have this baby--and soon!" We set up a time to go to the hospital to be induced...Wednesday, August 11th, 1999. For about a week I had been on bed rest at home, and my husband served me hand and foot. : ) : ) I was all nerves the night before the induction, but Richard remained calm (as usual) and prayed with me. My suitcase was ready, I felt God's nearness, but I still did not sleep well that night (I was very excited). We arrived at the hospital bright and early August 11th, and the labor began. I was doing real well, and quickly dilated to 9 cm's....but then we noticed the heart rate of our baby dropping dangerously low every time I had a contraction. The doctor came into the room and told us that something was compressing the baby's umbilical cord. I was moved around in all different kinds of positions, and they tried "floating the cord" with some kind of fluid stuff, but nothing helped. The second time the doctor came in, he informed us that we would need to have an emergency c-section. Just minutes prior to this, the nurses had brought in the birthing equipment (for natural births), so I had been thinking we were getting close to having the baby. I naturally asked, "why?". The cord was still compressed, and the doctor didn't think the baby could be delivered. We chose to labor a little longer, but there still was no progression (the heart rate only got worse), so we agreed to the c-section.....I was in tears and trying to listen to the Nun who sweetly came to me (it was a Catholic hospital) giving words of encouragement. Looking back I appreciate what she had to say, but at that point in time I was very upset. Right before they wheeled me away, my Mother in law came in, took my hand and said, "I know what you're going through right now Sara; I'm praying for you. Don't be scared." [she had had a c-section years before with her last child]. I couldn't speak, my heart was in my throat. Caleb's heart rate had improved after my contractions were stopped, so they allowed me to be awake for the surgery. He was born at 1:19 PM.... 7 pounds, 1 ounce, 21 1/2 inches long....and his umbilical cord was wrapped tightly around his shoulders/chest, and twice around his legs (which would explain the very low heart rate, and my failure to progress). Richard held Caleb up so I could see him...I was so relieved he had arrived--but had a moment of fear that he wouldn't know me since he was a c-section baby (funny the thoughts new moms have). Caleb had his eyes closed and was whimpering when I was finally allowed to hold him...I held him close and said, "Hello, Caleb!" Immediately, his eyes flew open to stare at me and he quit whimpering. I was so thrilled, and near tears. : ) Later on, when my family received news of Caleb's birth, my Mom told me that it was around 1 PM that she had a horrible feeling come over her, like there was something wrong with me or the baby (she only knew that we were at the hospital). She had then prayed for us, that God would have mercy. Now, my sweet little baby boy--Caleb Andre'-- is turning 9 years old!!!!!!! We are so thankful for him!!! What a blessing he's been in our family! I actually don't tell him this long story! I shorten it for a child to understand just how special he is...and what a gift from God! : ) I'll be sharing Antonin's birth story in a couple more weeks (he and Caleb are 2 years & 2 weeks apart).